Thursday 12 March 2009

Postcard from Earth (8: meet Lilly)

Dear Pater,

Well, how sweet is that? The lads have clubbed together and got me a donkey.

I say "got" advisedly, because we are not talking "purchased" here. I was a bit alarmed at the thought of handling suspect goods, but as they said "OK, so we stole her from the farmer, but after all, he stole her from her mother".

Now I know logic is not my strongest point, but I felt I couldn't argue with that.

And she's ever so sweet. She is called Lilly. I was quite excited to discover that she is marked with a cross down her back and withers. I said this meant that I would always be able to find her in a herd of donkeys.

At this the lads fell about laughing. Turns out that they're all marked like that. Humph. With all the mucking out I've done you'd think that I would have noticed. Oh, well, I'm a carpenter, not a donkey herdsman or whatever such is called.

Anyway, Lilly provided a perfect backdrop for a story I was telling a crowd of people. Well, a number of people. Several. Anyway, that's not the point. They were all griping about how to get along, no dosh for clothes etc etc. I think they thought I should be able to do something about it. Fact is, me and my mates need the dosh, not them. How else are we going to fund our good works?

So, I gestured over to where she was standing and said "Consider, Lilly's in the field. She weaves not, neither does she spin, but she's got a sight better coat on her than Solomon ever had".

There was a stunned silence. And they drifted off. But I think they were dead impressed.

That's all for now,
Love to Mama.

PS - You probably don't know about Solomon. Neither do I, much, truth to tell, but he was some kind of head honcho with lots of stuff, hence my reference. Perhaps you would tell Mama about Lilly? I'm sure she'd want to know.

11 comments:

Clare Wassermann said...

...and blessed are the cheesemakers...blessed are the Greek for they shall inherit the Elgin Marbles. Yes I foresee that one day your script will be written down young man.

John said...

Clare W - quite, and I expect the Greeks will inherit the Marbles, but only after they join the nuclear club. Cheesemakers, eh?

Pauline said...

I wish I didn't already know the outcome of this story...

Millennium Housewife said...

Earnest that was brilliant. Just Brilliant. MH

MikeH said...

Interesting concept! I definately have to come back here.

Janelle said...

ERNEST!? WHERE ARE YOU???? x j

Eliza said...

Just found this...great blog, only up tp reptile development, but will catch up.

Millennium Housewife said...

Wherefore art thou Earnest? Missing you...MH

Elaine said...

Ernest - where are you?

DogLover said...

Had a bit of a dream last night. Strange one. Dreamt I was to visit this blog and say that the Editor had been sacked. Doesn't mean anything to me. Don't know if it means anything to you readers of this blog (which I haven't visited before), but that's the message.

Can't claim it's genuine - may be totally false. You know what dreams are ...

DogLover said...

Now I've woken up and have had time to read some of the blog - the early stuff. Brilliant, isn't it.

I do hope the Editor hasn't been sacked. Hope he'll re-appear soon.